‘Am I doing enough?’
The mother load, invisible work and homeschooling.
When I asked the HERRD what was on your mind this week, homeschool mum Amy F. answered, "Am I doing enough?! But that’s always my question hehe".
I laughed and replied ME TOO!
But isn't this so true. The mental mother load is real. I'll admit I often wonder if homeschooling is adding to my already massive load. You know, why not just send the kids off to school?
But we all have our special reasons for homeschool. I know I do. Plus, sending them to school would just swap out one worry for another. Mothers just seem wired to worry, regardless of their circumstances. It's the maternal instinct, coupled with the invisible work we do every day.
All the hashtags #motherload #mumguilt #mumlife #invisiblework
I’m not sure what our own mothers called their load. There certainly were no forums to share feelings, or hashtags to coin their state of minds. But I am sure they also felt the heavy weight of motherhood. The load is real, and the woman’s brain is one wired machine.
Maggie Dent made Kate Ritchie cry over this very thing. And Wanda Sykes makes comedy of females' busy brains trying to fall asleep. It can be quite the joke, but it's not always funny.
I’m a stay at home Mum. What is my net worth?
Last year I did a deep dive into this whole topic. It was sparked by my guilt for choosing homeschooling over employment. Then I found this fascinating TEDx talk by NZ economist Marilyn Warring 'The unpaid work that GDP ignores -- and why it really counts'. I was reminded of the invaluable work I do in my home, even though some economics ignores my worth.
Waring talks of how in the world of economy, the unpaid work of mothers can be ignored. She provides some humorous examples:
“So in the last week or so, how many of you have transported members of your household or their goods without payment? How many of you have done a bit of cleaning, a bit of vacuuming, a bit of sweeping, a bit of tidying up the kitchen? Yeah? How about going shopping for members of the household? Preparing food? Cleaning up afterwards?Laundry? Ironing?
Well, as far as economics is concerned, you were at leisure.
Now, how about the women who have been pregnant and who have had children? Yes. Now, I really hate to tell you this, because it might well have been hard labour, but at that moment, you were unproductive", according to the GDP.
She also makes some clever primary producer and farming references our rural mamas will find very relatable.
So, what do you do when you find yourself asking ‘Am I doing enough?’
Firstly, I bet you are rocking it, you just underestimate yourself. Secondly, remember some of the best things in life can’t be quantified. Thirdly, you are not alone. We all feel the load too. So, reach out to your friends or join your local homeschool group. Or if you would like to have a chat, book a free call with Jillina from Homeschool Hotline.
Get help with the Australian Homeschooling Summit
Additionally, if you want some homeschool inspiration and tips - Join the Australian Homeschooling Summit 2024. The summit is live from 4-15 March. We are currently in the second week of the summit, but all workshops are being recorded. Ticket holders will have unlimited access to the summit for the lifetime of the product, so you can catch up and rewatch summit talks as you wish. Tickets are only $37 which gives you all access to over 30 workshops and activities. That’s less than $1.25 per workshop!
“I’ve been absolutely terrified every moment of my life — and I’ve never let it keep me from doing a single thing I wanted to do.”
“Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.”
